"La realidad es aquello que es eterno e inmutable, aquello que existe en sí mismo y no depende de ninguna otra cosa para existir."
"Reality is that which is eternal and unchanging, that which exists in itself and does not depend on anything else for its existence".
Platón
Cuando todo va de mal en peor, no sé que es mejor, preguntarte qué demonios está pasando, o descojonarte de la risa porque en el fondo sabes que todo lo que percibes es ficción.
Durante aquel mes de febrero me propuse optar por lo segundo, pero me faltaron ganas de reír porque tenía ante mí "una ficción desastrosa".
-Hazte cargo de tus mierdas y no te comas las de los demás. Por irreales que parezcan, hoy por hoy, todo ello forma parte de tu realidad, ¡y realmente te está complicando la existencia!- me dije.
Pero, pese a ello, me dejé arrastrar por un bucle de negatividad, que provocó que mi realidad ilusoria hiciese conmigo lo que le dio la gana.
Supongo que mi realidad de ficción me superó tanto que no supe como manejarla.
Me equivoqué al preguntarme si todo era verdadero o falso.
La pregunta que debí hacerme era¿quién está al mando de esa ficción tuya de la que no te estás haciendo cargo?
Especialmente, tras el concierto de losPoison Boys, que presentaban su album 'Headed for disaster' ¡Hasta el título me estaba avisando que estaba yendo por el camino equivocado!
Si me sirvió de algo aquel evento y los días posteriores, fue para hacerme consciente de mi rechazo hacia algunosrasgos de mi personalidad y viejos hábitos que me estaban perjudicando.
De repente, mi versión de andar por casa se rebeló contra la que se mueve de puertas para afuera. Esa vieja conocida, ahora me parecía una extraña.
Ser extrovertida y hablar tanto con cualquiera ya no parecía una buena manera de divertirse.
Me di cuenta de que mis salidas nocturnas me drenaban demasiada energía. Ya no me recuperaba en un par de días...
Tampoco eran sólo resacas, ¡me ponía realmente enferma!
Y para colmo, durante esos días tuve que lidiar con una plaga de piojos que los niños habían cogido en el colegio y la pésima relación que en aquel momento tenían mis hijos con su papá... ¡No podía más!
Sufrí tanta ansiedad que recuerdo que me dije:
"Esta realidad de ficción ya no se puede mantener".
26/2/2023
When everything goes from bad to worse, I don't know whether it's better to wonder what the hell is going on or to laugh your head off because deep down you know that everything you perceive is fiction.
During that month of February I decided to opt for the latter, but I didn't feel like laughing because I had ‘a disastrous fiction’in front of me.
-Take charge of your bullshit and don't care about anyone´s crap. As unreal as they may seem, nowadays, all of them are part of your reality, and they are really complicating your existence!- I said to myself.
But despite this, I let myself get suckedinto a loop of negativity, which caused my illusory reality to do with me as it pleased.
I guess my fictional reality overcame me so much that I didn't know how to handle it.
What is the point of asking whether something is true or false?
The question to ask yourself is who is in charge of this fiction of yours that you are not in charge of!
I should have said something like that to myself after the Poison Boys concert, who were presenting their album ‘Headed for disaster’. Even the title was telling me I was on the wrong track!
If that event and the days that followed did anything for me, it was to become aware of my rejection of some of my personality traits and old habits that were damaging me.
Suddenly, I felt as if the home version of me was rebelling against the outdoors one. That old acquaintance seemed to me like a stranger now.
Being outgoing and talking so much to anyone didn't seem like the best way to have fun anymore.
My nights out drained me too much energy. It wasn't a couple of days, but twice as long as it took me to recover.
They were not just hangovers, I got really sick!
And to make matters worse, during those days I had to deal with a plague of lice that the children had caught at school and the terrible relationship they had at that time with their father....I could not stand anymore!
I got so anxious that I remember saying to myself:
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